Thousands of households in Scotland have received calls this week from ex-007, ex-rug-head and ex-Scot Sean Connery asking them to vote for the Scottish National Party. It is an automated call made at random to people just about to sit down to haggis and neeps.

Connery is so much in favour of Scottish independence that he lives independently of Scotland himself. In fact, he hasn’t lived there for over 50 years. The last time he lived there Elvis Presley was unheard of and Scotland could play football.

Previously Connery has made the claim that he would consider returning to Scotland if it were an independent country. He complains that the media is foreign owned. He has a point. Oddly enough, though, he has something in common with the foreigner who owns much of the British media — he pokes his nose into the country’s politics from thousands of miles away!