The Beeb will do anything for a good poll. Even the posh programmes want to get in on the act. The latest top ten best ever in the whole wide world topic is thinking. Yes, Melvyn Bragg and his fine Radio 4 show In Our Time, which you can listen to online (don’t all rush, the BBC server can’t stand it), have had a poll to find out the nation’s favourite philosopher. Well, the favourite philosopher of listeners to this particular programme anyway. If you asked most British people who their favourite philosopher was they’d stare at you blankly or ask you if you’re trying to be funny. In fact, it could be dangerous in some parts of the north.

Karl Marx came top, polling 27% of the votes. More than the Labour Party used to get when they were a bit lefty. There is a suspicion, however, that every Marxist in the country was tipped off to this poll and voted for their beloved author of Das Kapital. As Marx garnered 30,000 votes this seems plausible. There can’t be that many more Marxists left surely!

Readers might, or might not, be surprised to hear that all the top noggin exerters are dead, not even George W Bush making the grade. Which just goes to show that we can’t think like we used to. There’s so much else to do with our time nowadays though, don’t you find?